"Guten Morgen, Frau Ethington"

I wrote the first half of this blog post while sitting in the Frankfurt Airport waiting for my flight:


Last night was definitely not my most peaceful sleep, but it was entertaining. I was the only girl in a three person room and the two guys sharing the room with me (one from Korea and one from Ghana) were incredibly talkative. It was their first time in Germany and were really excited about going out the next day and seeing everything. They pulled out a map and I showed them which U-Bahn to take and where and showed them the easiest routes to go places.

Turns out the Korean guy is headed to Marburg in a couple of days to visit a friend and he asked me all kinds of questions about it and I was more than happy to oblige. I was up late talking to those two and after I told them I really had to go to bed we all got in bed but were kept awake by the screaming hookers, awful techno music, and sirens blaring in through the windows. I must have slept only a couple hours off and on. I wasn't bothered too much because I thought it was just really funny and I figured that no sleep that night means more sleep on the plane. 

This morning I lugged my stuff down the Hauptbahnhof walking down the alleys of the Red Light District where the party was still raging. When I got down to the S-Bahn station, a family from Pennsylvania was staring at the map looking really confused. They were trying to find the Airport like I was and I told them I would help them out (even though I had extreme hesitations and doubts about my own capabilities). Turns out everything went well and I walked over to check-in to find that my flight had been delayed from 10.30 to 14.45. So, i'm sitting in what is called the "Leisure Zone" (aka more comfortable chairs than the ones at the burger king across the hallway) and typing away trying not to fall asleep. This little kid sitting next to me is making this really annoying noise clicking the handle of the roller-suitcase up and down, but luckily his mother just told him, "If you keep doing that, the pilot will KICK YOU OFF THE PLANE!" I think she's had a long morning...

In relation to the title of this post, I've heard, "Guten Morgen, Frau Ethington" about 10 times this morning. And i'm not even mad. I hate when people call me Ms. Ethington... but Frau Ethington has more character to it.

This next bit I am writing the morning of my second day back in the US (at a good jetlagged hour of six in the morning):

It was kind of a nightmare getting home. After that delayed flight I ended up in Dallas with yet another delayed flight and didn't even get home until after midnight.
Dallas was honestly really terrifying. The first thing I noticed were drinking fountains that were everywhere, secondly there were so many American flags EVERYWHERE and it was so so so incredibly loud.

I basically passed out on the flight from Dallas to Salt Lake because I didn't sleep at all on the one from Frankfurt due to a farting Sri Lankan guy that was sitting next to me. Typisch.

Being home is a really strange thing that I can't really describe. It feels like my time spent in Marburg was just one long dream that I suddenly woke up from, but then being here also seems like a dream and any minute i'll snap awake in my little cave of a dorm room in Marburg. I knew culture shock existed, but I didn't know what it really meant. I feel like a have been spending a lot of time just looking at things. The streets here are HUGE, the cars are HUGE, the mountains are HUGE, the people are HUGE, the drinks at restaurants are HUGE, everything is just HUGE HUGE HUGE. I spent my first day mostly with my older brother. We went to Nostalgia (the coffee shop I used to spend basically every day at) and sat outside drinking coffee and playing cards. Then we went off to buy some new pants and then back to his place to play Left 4 Dead. That was my first time playing a video game in 10 months and let me tell you, it wasn't pretty. Not at all. My sister came by and we ran off to the liquor store to get wine and then came back to my mom's to be wined and dined. I barely ate anything at all yesterday and my stomach is not happily reacting to what I DID eat. Hopefully that will all get back to normal somewhere in the next couple days. Dearest friend, Autumn returns from Bonaire tonight, I don't know what time, but I'm hoping it's before 22.00 so we can go off to a bar that my sister works at later. Today is going to be spent trying to find my old phone charger, my bus pass, doing laundry, and trying to keep my mind in check as I coast around this strange Twilight Zone.

This is my last blog post, so kids I thank you for reading it and I hope you enjoyed something from it.

Tschüß!

Too... Too Many Books.

Last night Rabea, Chelsea, Mimi, and I went to Hinkelstein (the dungeon-looking bar) to watch the Ukraine vs. Sweden game (Euro cup 2012 is going on right now for those of you who do not know). I'm usually not a big football fan, but I like to get into the games and it's an excuse to yell and be belligerent.

Mimi and I cheered for Ukraine while Rabea and Chelsea cheered for Sweden, and I can't deny that the slow motion shots were... wonderful. They have some beautiful men on this side of the planet. After UKRAINE WON (muahaha), we all went back home and I went back to cleaning out my room. I went to bed at 3 a.m. and then woke up at 9 a.m. to finish cleaning before my terrifying Haus Frau came to check me out of my room. After I was checked out I picked up my backpack and- no... that's an understatement... I had to FORKLIFT my backpack onto my back and then use a crane to get my suitcase down the hill and onto the bus. I didn't realize just how many books I had gotten while here and how difficult it would be to get everything back to the US.

I now had my Laufzettel and could make my way down to the Studentenwerk where I would get my €150,00 deposit. My Haus Frau told me that she took off €30,00 for cleaning (which they usually always do with everyone), so I was looking forward to having at least €100,00. This is where I had my last brush with German bureaucracy. I had to take my Laufzettel to an office in the Studentenwerk and get  it notarized or something, take that form and another to the accounting department and let them figure out the rest.

When I walked into the first office I didn't exactly know where I was going, this lady at the front desk (who was missing an arm) looked up and saw that I was a bit lost. There in that space where her other arm should be was a little finger-looking appendage that she used to point at a door next to me and say, "um die Ecke!" A little taken aback at what happened, I stumbled over to the door around the corner and went into the other office where I awkwardly announced what I was there for. A plump rosy-cheeked woman motioned over to me and without a word snatched my form and began typing, writing, and calculating and then had me sign a couple forms (which could very well have said that I would give them my first born child) and then told me to go to the accounting office. I walked around the corner and the appendage lady motioned to the exit. I walked into the accounting office and this tall regal blonde german lady came rushing over to me and offered me a seat and a candy (I took five, I was very nervous). She grabbed my form and started stamping things, writing things down, typing something on her computer, and brought out a giant accounting calculator and started plucking away on the keys like a lady with a mission. She then turned to me and said (in German), "You owe us €23,63." i was so taken aback by the fact that I walked in with the expectations of receiving over €100 and instead OWEING them money I said (in English), "WHAT?" And she proceeded to say it again, but in english and I said (in German), "No no no... I understand what you said, I just don't see how that could have happened." She looked down at the form and then back at her calculator and realized she had made a mistake... she reworked everything and turns out I only get €12,00 back. I didn't care as long as I didn't owe them money, I still got worked by the German Accounting Dep. though.
I walked out of that office and down to the second floor where Rabea's brother was watching my awfully heavy suitcase for me. Rabea went and turned my uCard in and I got at least €15,00 for that.

Now it was Goodbye Time. A few months ago Chelsea and I decided not to tell each other when we were leaving to go back to the US. I was able to keep it a secret, but somehow she had discovered that I was on the top floor of Studentenwerk and the only reason anybody goes up there is to get their room deposits back. So, she came up and waited while I went through that mess I had just described. When we rejoined Rabea's brother and Mimi downstairs, Chelsea took one look at my bags and the emotions started flooding, so she and I went outside and sat on a bench. I faced that castle and looked up at it thinking of all the times I had sat on this one particular bench just taking it all in. Chelsea and I sat there in almost complete silence, neither of us knowing what to say or how to even deal with this kind of situation. It was strange because she and I usually can't shut up when we are together, but this time it was just silence, and that's when you can tell when things are bad. We went back up to join the others where there was another 20 minutes of just awkward silence. Then I decided that I just had to go. I was feeling nauseous again from this whole farewell thing and I just needed to get moving. So, I said goodbye to Mimi and then Rabea plowed into me giving me a good old fashioned german bear hug. It was definitely really sweet. Chelsea and I just kind of stood there staring at each other.

She said, "I can feel my heartbeat in my fingers."
To which I replied, "Yeah... I think i'm going to puke."
"Yeah, me too."

Then she asked if we could have one of those awkward side-hugs and we did, but it was really painful. I took one last look at everyone and just turned right on my heel and headed for the Hauptbahnhof. As I walked out the doors I thought I could hear that little group laughing. Whether they were laughing about me or at me, I didn't care because that's exactly how I want to remember them: laughing.

As I was on the train watching the castle I loved so dearly slowly disappear into the distance, I didn't really feel nauseous anymore. I felt that weird bitter-sweet feeling when you leave somewhere that has so many wonderful things tied to it. In reality it was kind of like a strange sense of satisfaction and fulfillment, like I came, I saw, and I conquered. Though I still would have liked more time, it wasn't quite as painful as I had thought. I think it's the people I left that is really getting to me.

I wish someone had filmed me trying to get onto the train with my suitcase... at one point I was wedged in the door way with really know way out until by some miracle from the gods, I squeezed onto the train. Getting off the train in Frankfurt was a bit easier, I just kind of flopped down onto the platform like a whale, flopped around a bit, gasped for air, and then continued on like nothing had happened. I found my way to my hostel which is in the heart of Frankfurt's Red Light District. The hostel really isn't bad at all, it's situated between a couple really fine family-friendly places called, "American Pussy" and "Turkish Delight." Across the street is a lovely looking place with a creative name. It's called, "SEX SEX SEX." After a dropped all my stuff off in my room, I ran off to the spring market outside the Hauptbahnhof and got a Wurst and some Apfelwein, then I went into the Hauptbahnhof and sat down on a bench at Gleis 15 (the platform that usually goes in the direction of Marburg). An RE train was leaving to go to Marburg and I saw a few people I knew and played with the club-footed pigeons that were scuttling around on the floor. After another nice little walk I came back to my room to find another person in there snoring away. This kid is out like a rock. The hostel is having a BBQ and watching more Euro Cup games, so i'm going to go down there and join them. Not a bad way to spend my last night in Deutschland.

Now I just have to figure out how my book-laden back is going to survive tomorrow.

Tschüß!

The Last of the Lahn Days

The days of infinite sun in Marburg have passed. May was probably the most beautiful month I've experienced so far in Germany. Every day we were stretched out on the Lahn practicing sloth, but lately Marburg has gone back to its old rainy self. I was talking with Rabea the other night about how I would like to just have one last Lahn Day before I leave, and sure enough... the Germanic gods granted my wish and the sun came out to play yesterday. So, we all marched down to the Lahn and occupied the grass by the river for hours. We sat around talking and drinking beer/wine, playing frisbee, and eventually took a much needed nap.


I woke up laying on my back on the grass and looking up at a perfectly blue sky. Every now and then a white frisbee would go zooming over my head as Andrew and Hayden tossed it back and forth for about an hour. These times on the Lahn have probably been one of my favorite parts about Marburg. Everyone just takes some time to relax and not worry about anything. I definitely needed this Lahn Day. I have been getting all kinds of nots in my stomach about having to go home and other people in my program have already left or are leaving in the next couple days.

After the long afternoon and evening by the Lahn we made our way back up to Studentendorf where we had yet another bonfire (which has turned into something we do on a regular basis). All night long we sat around the fire drinking, talking, playing music, and saying bitter sweet goodbyes. A huge chunk of the group are headed for Budapest tomorrow and wont be back until after I'm gone so I had to say goodbye to a lot of really fantastic people last night. It's a real shame that I'm the only one that lives in the West. Pretty much most of the group goes to Penn State or lives in Wisconsin so they are all pretty close to each other. I'll just have to make some kind of pilgrimage east one of these days.

Today I ran off to Kassel for dOCUMENTA (13). It's basically the biggest exhibition of contemporary art in the world. I couldn't afford to go in, so I just pressed my face against the glass like a creepy pauper and looked around at what I could. I came back to Marburg and sat outside at Fiona's drinking tea and reading while I waited for the bus. When I got back to my room I started packing and cleaning. I didn't realize just how many books I had bought while I was here. Basically my entire backpack is crammed full of just books... my back is going to hate me.

The Euro Cup started yesterday (European football tournament) and tonight Germany plays Portugal. It's being broadcast on a giant screen up by the castle where I'm sure more than half of Marburg will be. I hope for my sake and the rest of this country's sake that Germany wins... I've seen what happens when a favored team loses and it is not the prettiest (like when Chelsea beat Bayern... that was ugly). It should prove to be a most eventful night ending it most likely another one of these farewell bonfires.

I'm reminded of a Kerouac quote that pretty much sums up everything that's been going on the last month or so: "We were alone and mixing up our souls ever more and ever more till it would be terribly hard to say good-by."

And I leave you with that, my friends. I'm off to have more adventures until Doom's Day.

... but we're not talking about that.

As my stay here in Germany is winding down a certain phrase is repeated continuously in every conversation I have with people and it goes a little something like this:

"Well, when I get back to the US..."
"BUT WE'RE NOT TALKING ABOUT THAT!"

 Most of us refuse to acknowledge that there is this pending doom hanging over all of us within the next couple weeks. So we just don't talk about that, but I'm afraid right now I'm going to HAVE to talk about that.

 This last week everyone from what I've called, "The Wisconsin Horde" have all been moving out. They are the big group of about 40 people who are all from Wisconsin that randomly showed up at the beginning of January. I was friends with a few of them, but especially Kelli and Maggie who live on my floor. Maggie and I spent a lot of time out on our balcony drinking wine or tea with too many lemons. Kelli is the die-hard Packers fan who loves to cook and bake though she seems to think that she fails at both. The three of us have spent a lot of time just sitting on the balcony talking and talking. Maggie left a couple days ago and Kelli was supposed to leave yesterday, but she missed her flight because the cables between Marburg and Giessen (the only line to the Frankfurt Airport) was broken. So, she's crashing with me for the night which makes me happy because I was already missing her. She told me that as she was sitting on the train watching the castle disappear she started crying like a fiend and an old german lady asked her, "Alles in ordinung?" And Kelli replied through hysterical tears, "NEIN! ALLES IST NICHT IN ORDINUNG!" And apparently the lady was so freaked that she changed spots. Kelli is definitely one of the sweetest people I've ever met. And when she showed up at my dorm this morning she brought me a chocolate croissant. She just left to go biking through the canola fields for the last time and I'm staying in to clean my room and get some things in order for when I leave in the next couple weeks.

Cleaning is such a dangerous... DANGEROUS thing. It is one of the biggest memory joggers and is not a safe thing to do when you've been denying the inevitable. I started with the safest thing: the sink where I only had a few memories of binge-tea drinking with Spencer from last year and as I poured bleach into the basin I remembered cleaning the mold from my windows in -25 degree weather.
The real rough stuff happened when I started emptying and sorting my desk drawers. There I found stacks of maps from all of the different places I had been, the map of Marburg I never used, old train passes, bus reservations for Prague, boat tickets for Finland, trolley stubs, U-Bahn/S-Bahn maps from Berlin, and my RyanAir flight ticket stubs to Scotland, Ireland, and Estonia. I just continued to throw them all away (with the exception of the maps and the boat tickets now using as bookmarks), but I couldn't bring myself to throw away one particular thing I had found.

I rediscovered my first train ticket from Frankfurt to Marburg. As I stared at it I saw all of my former anxieties, fears, and anticipations. I knew then that I would come to love this place, though I had no idea exactly how MUCH leaving Marburg would hurt me. Even right now I'm just staring at the screen with no idea what to write as the rain pours hard against my window in good Marburg fashion. I'm so terrified to go back to the U.S. Aside from my usual fears of having to talk to the Haus Frau to check out, getting my boarding pass printed, getting to the trainstation, and then getting to the airport... I'm terrified of how I'm going to feel when I get home. I know there will be that surge of excitement to see a few people again, but how long will that last? I know that I wont be able to communicate everything that's happened to me properly and that basically nobody will quite understand what's happened to me. I'm definitely certain that my family and friends will want to take a frying pan to my face every time I bring up Marburg or Germany, but that's all I can relate things to.

It's going to be strange only hearing English with the occasional Spanish thrown in here and there. In Marburg it's always German, but since there are so many study abroad students we also have a lot of Spanish, Chinese, Arabic, Hungarian, Italian, Slovanian, Slovakian, Russian, Polish, Czech, French, Romanian...etc.

I guess I wont know how things will go down until I get back to the U. S.

There we go. I talked about "that." I guess I just needed to get it out there and now I can go back to cleaning and then prancing around drinking by the Lahn and just enjoying what little time I have left in my favorite place.